


Heavy Weight

by Vauxiliatrix



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: : I wanted this to be angstier but it got soft, Andreil, Angst, M/M, Umm it could be considered a panic attack, and god know they deserve it, because I love soft moments between these boys, blood mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-03
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2019-01-28 23:33:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12618044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vauxiliatrix/pseuds/Vauxiliatrix
Summary: Neil gets a wake up call and Andrew is the heavy weight of a reminder that Neil needs.





	Heavy Weight

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea spontaneously at like 12 am rip.

One day in the middle of practice, Neil gets a call.

Neil doesn't say or do anything except claim "I have to go.” Before leaving the court, he turns to Andrew. He offers him a reassuring look before he goes into the locker room, changes out, then leaves the stadium. The foxes are at a loss at whatever could be so important it stops Neil Josten from exy practice. A few of the foxes turn to Andrew for any sort of clue, but Andrew sports his signature blank, bored look, and they drop it with the cue of Kevin yelling at them to get back to practice.  
\---------------------------------------------  
It was well past midnight when Neil entered the dorm. The loud click of the lock of their shared room resounded through the area. Neil wobbled into the room to meet an awaiting andrew, who was laying wide awake on the bed. Andrews gaze was sharp on Neils silhouette and followed the too bright eyes that glistened with the seeping moonlight leaking through the curtains. 

Neil wasn't, Neil. His hoodie was covered in splatters of blood. Neils hair was ruffled to hell and his appearance was overall disheveled. He was visibly tense and his body held the all too familiar stance of someone ready to book it any second. Eyes distant and expression so blank it'd give Andrew a run for his money, it was evident he wasn’t entirely here nor himself. It isn’t what Andrew had expected, but he took it in stride. 

Andrew got up and looked at Neil. He didnt approach, but he asked him "Neil," which got a mixed reaction of several expressions from confused to neutral to contemplation, "What do you need." Neil hesitated before responding with "Court." So of course, Andrew drives him there. Andrew enters the code, takes out Neils keys which Andrew blatantly showcases and unlocks the stadium doors. Neil hurries in, and hesitates at the doors that lead into the court. Neil then swung open the door and walked to the middle. Neil sat there, basking in the court, Andrews solid presence watching his back. 

After ages, Neil silently stands up. He exited the court and began to walk to the doors to leave the stadium. He stopped and stood there, his back looking emptier than Andrew can recall, before enunciating “Andrew, take me home.” The drive back was silent.  
\------------------------  
Andrew assumed Neil wanted to be alone when Neil started to make his way to toward the bathroom, but neil shook his head and coaxed andrew to follow him with a pull of his sweatshirt. Andrew complied and followed. Neil pauses to gaze at his reflection, familiarity passing his expression. Andrew recognizes this look. He sets an unwavering stare at Neil in his reflection behind him. "You are Neil Abram Josten. Jersey Number 10, starting striker for Palmetto. You are fox. You are here, you are not what you were raised to be." Andrew reminds him. Neils expression contorts into something pained before he grips the sink to support himself, and looks down at the drain before he speaks.

"Ichirou called.” Andrew raised a brow and Neil swallowed before he continued, breath shaky. "He needed me as a Wesninski,” A small, sad smile replaced his troubled expression. “Said I have a job to do, and it's time to start doing it as the butchers replacement.” The smile then grew into something ugly, almost horrific. “This is the first call, but it won't be the last. I killed a man today and there'll be more in the future.” A weak, choked laugh escaped from Neil before he whispered “How can I be Neil Josten? How can I even attempt to continue living this lie when I execute everything I was tought like today. Im turning out just like him. I’m going to have to keep being exactly what the butcher was and killing for the Moriyamas. Again and again and again." 

Neils knuckles turn white as he clenches the edge of the sink. He switches his grip from the sink to his hair, his breathing going rash as he continues. “I can't be like him Andrew.” A whine escapes his lips “He’s dead but even now he's taking my life away from me I don’t want-" Neil gulps down rising bile as reoccuring flashes of what hes done tonight flits through his head. This is when Andrew steps in, his hand on the back of neils neck in the real, reassuring nature that is, Andrew Minyard, who is a part of no one other than Neil Jostens life. They stand there for a bit, silent, before Andrew asks “Neil, yes or no?” In turn, Neil whispers a yes. Andrew leaves Neil for just a second, and shortly the sound of the shower water running resonates in the bathroom. Andrew returns to neil, his eyes reaffirming that this is still a yes, which it is. Neil could probably only stand Andrew touching him right now, anyone else would be too much. He knows Andrews apathetic nature won't adhere much of a reaction, and Andrew has already seen him at his near worst. He needed Andrew right now.

Andrew strips off Neils clothing, and disregards them to the corner of the bathroom, bunched up and out of sight. He then takes off his own shirt and arm bands before he pushes Neil into the shower. Neil sighs as the scalding water hits his back and he closes his eyes, letting the water envelop him entirely. Andrew joins him shortly after that and proceeds by gently wiping the caked blood off of Neils arms, the blood off of Neils face, and the blood out of Neils hair. Neil is watching the blood stained water spin down the drain and Andrew grips his chin, lifting Neils head to face Andrew as he begins to wash off the rest. It takes time, but when Neil feels he’s clean enough, Andrew leaves him in the shower for a second to get clothes for the both of them. Neil dries off, dresses and then follows Andrew out of the bathroom and to the bed.

Andrew finally speaks since the "yes and no" after his breakdown, "Listen, because I am only going to say this once." A lie, he'd repeat it anytime Neil needed it. "You are not your father nor will you ever be. You may be using what you've been tought, but you are not doing it out of pleasure or blatant enjoyment." The truth, Andrew would never let him be. "You are doing this so you can live, live your life as Neil Abram Josten." Andrew then pushes Neil to sit on the bed, and looks him straight in the eye in a silent ask of confirmation. Neil nods, and Andrew proceeds by sitting in Neils lap, having Neil lean back on his arms for support. Andrews eyes never leave Neils.

"I won't let you, and I'll be here to remind you who you are. I need you to repeat after me, I am Neil Abram Josten." Neil focuses on Andrews weight on top of him and repeats, “I am Neil Abram Josten." Andrew continues. " This is the life I have chosen to live." Neil then focuses on Andrews honey glazed hazel eyes,the tension slowly easing out from his figure as he repeats in a whisper “This is the life I have chosen to live." Theyre silent for a breath of a second before Andrew goes on. "And I am stuck being an exy obsessed moron with an assassin side job because I couldn't keep my liar mouth shut and I have issues that have long past the standard of "I’m fine"." Neils figure then nearly collapses as the last of the tension is released and he nearly melts into Andrew, his chest bouncing as he huffs a laugh .

Neil then smiles. He smiles that annoying smile that Andrew hates. The smile that proves Andrew was everything Neil had never thought he ever wanted or needed. The smile that reminded Andrew that he was the border between what was and what is. A smile that shows without a doubt Neil treats Andrew as a figure of unwavering support and reliance to remind that Neil Josten isn’t just a lie. That he’s real and living a life he couldn't even begin to imagine. Neil sets his head in the crook of Andrews neck and whispers a breathy "yes or no?" into it. Andrew shivers and utters a “Yes." Neil picks his head up and his lips meet Andrews. Neil smiles into the kiss and a silent thank you passes between them as they lay in their designated spots and relax in each others presence. Their hands are wrapped together, the heavy weight as a reminder that this was real. A weight that was a reminder that they were real.

**Author's Note:**

> This rides the headcanon that part of the deal with Ichirou was that in ichirous presence, he wasn't Neil Josten, but Nathaniel Wesninski who had to take on the role of the Butcher and take on certain, Jobs, for the Moriyamas when needed.  
> Follow me on tumblr!! @angstie-gaykeepers  
> Im working on the second chapter of Prekitament as we speak, I just had to get this out of my system.


End file.
